Aromantic
Aromantic (commonly shortened to aro) is an orientation defined by little to no romantic attraction, the prefix a- meaning not or lack of in Greek.[1][2] The aromantic spectrum (often shorted to aro-spec or arospec) is an umbrella term for all aromantic identities, or a term used by individuals who do not wish to identify themselves with any particular aromantic microlabel.[3]
Being aromantic does not mean that one is unable to experience sexual attraction or any other type of attractions. An aromantic individual can have any sexual orientation. They may identify with a sexual orientation in addition to the label of aromantic to specify who they're interested in sexually, if anyone.[4] For example, a heterosexual aromantic individual is sexually attracted to individuals of a different gender, but is not romantically attracted to any gender. Some aromantic individuals are also asexual (aroace), meaning they experience neither sexual nor romantic attraction.
Romantic dispositions among aromantic individuals can vary. Some aromantic individuals may still have or seek romantic relationship(s) despite not feeling romantic attraction to anyone (cupioromantic).[2] This could be for many reasons, such as for their own pleasure, state benefits, household aid, or feeling that one's attraction is not an important aspect to partaking in their romantic relationship(s). Other aromantic individuals may be repulsed by the concept of romance. Terms like romance-repulsed, romance-indifferent, romance-favorable, or romance-ambivalent are commonly used to describe these attitudes.
A common misconception is that all aromantic individuals lack emotions, lack the ability to form social connections, or are loveless. In reality many aromantic individuals are capable of feeling love, and can meet their emotional needs via queerplatonic, platonic, familial, or other non-romantic relationships.[5] Other aromantic individuals may not desire partners of any kind, and may identify as nonamorous. Some aromantics embrace the loveless label and reject the idea that love is necessary for their own wellbeing and happiness.[6]
Romantic Attraction
Due to the ambiguous nature of romantic attraction it can sometimes be difficult to identify when one is aromantic. Romantic attraction is sometimes defined by the actions that one takes during a relationship, such as holding hands, kissing, or cuddling. However, none of these activities alone necessarily indicate romantic attraction. These actively are only considered romantic if one personally considers them romantic in nature and does them with romantic intent.[7] An aromantic individual might enjoy some or all of these activities in non-romantic contexts, but does not like them in romantic context. Because of this some queerplatonic relationships or close friendships can sometimes resemble or be mistaken for a romantic relationship; with the difference being that in a queerplatonic relationship the participants agree that it is non-romantic, and in a romantic relationship the participants agree that it is romantic in nature. Therefore, the nature of a relationship is best defined by the intentions of the participants. If one or any partners feels romantic attraction and all partners agree to a romantic context, then the relationship is considered romantic.
The various definitions of romantic attraction can make it difficult to identify when one is aromantic, especially when one has trouble distinguishing between romantic feelings and platonic feelings. If this is the case one might identify as platoniromantic, idemromantic, nebularomantic, sensualarian or quoiromantic.
History
The term aromantic was first coined in an AVEN thread titled "Relationship Definitions" in June, 2005.[8] While this is not the first usage of the split attraction model it is one of the first mentions of the term aromantic. After this there is very little mention of aromanticism until 2010, when aromanticism began to gain a community on the AVEN forum.
Related Terms
| Label | Relationship | Description | Difference |
|---|---|---|---|
| Alloromantic | Opposite | An individual that experiences romantic attraction. | Aromantic individuals rarely or never experience romantic attraction. |
| Aplatonic | Counterpart | An individual that experiences little to no platonic attraction. | Aplatonic is the platonic counterpart to aromantic. |
| Aroace | Similar | An individual that experiences little to no romantic nor sexual attraction. | Aroace includes asexual. |
| Asexual | Counterpart | An individual that experiences little to no sexual attraction. | Asexual is the sexual counterpart to aromantic. |
| Nonamorous | Similar | Not desiring intimate, long-term, committed partnerships, including romantic, sexual, queerplatonic, and platonic life-partners. | Aromantic does not inherently imply a lack of life-long partnerships. |
Prefixes and Suffixes
| Label | Prefix / Suffix | Flag | Description | Creator(s) |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Aroflirt | -flirt |  [9]
|
Aromantic but still desires to engage in flirtatious behaviour.[9] | b-e-b-b-l-e |
| Aroflex | -flex |  [10]
|
Experiencing a less intense, consistent form of attraction that is somewhere between romantic and queerplatonic attraction while one’s feelings towards romance/romantic gestures fluctuates.[11] | on-fic-writing-spree |
| Aroflexible | -flexible |  [12] [13]
|
Mostly aromantic with one or two cases of romantic attraction; occasionally or rarely experiences romantic attraction; aromantic with fluidity.[14][15][12] | Star Bit, alienistlesbian, pride-flags-for-us, goldsgenderstuff |
| Arofluid | -fluid |  [16]
|
Fluid between arospec orientations, such as identifying as frayromantic, to identifying as demiromantic.[18] | satusepiida, Pride-Flags, chronically-aspec |
| Aroflux | -flux |  [19][20] [21]
|
Fluctuating between feeling romantic attraction and lacking romantic attraction.[22] | ngc2068, Chaoticcylinder, Pride-Flags, the-circus |
| Aroflux (alt) | Synonymous with arofluid (see above).[19] | |||
| Arofluix | -fluix |  [23]
|
Both aroflux and arofluid.[24] | hypnosiacon-archived, Kau, arco-pluris |
| Arofog | -fog |  [25]
|
An individual that knows they are aromantic but are unsure if one experiences romantic attraction as a result of neurodiversity, or unsure if one is sex-repulsed as a result of neurodiversity.[25] | Crayonpuppy.x |
| Arojump | -jump |  [26]
|
Normally alloromantic, but occasionally experiences sudden and intense periods of aromanticism.[26] | luigis-mogai-mansion |
| Arolink | -link |  [27]
|
An individual whose aromanticism is an intrinsic part of their identity and affects all parts of themselves.[27] | pokemania |
| Aromid | -mid |  [28]
|
Strictly aromantic but partially asexual.[28] | star-allos |
| Arospike | -spike |  [29]
|
Normally aromantic, but occasionally experiences sudden and intense romantic attraction for a short period of time.[30][29] | Cyzu, Unknown |
| Arovague | -vague |  [31]
|
Aromanticism partially influenced by one's neurodivergence.[31] | transboy-lou, Unknown |
| Arovoid | -void |  [32]
|
Experiences neutral or no feelings towards one's own orientations except one's aromanticity.[32] | aromagpie |
Flags and Symbols
The first proposed aromantic/aromantic spectrum flag was published by the National Coalition for Aromantic Visibility/aromantic.org in 2010 after a vote from a small number of users, including the mods of Tumblr blog lithromantic and their friends.[33][34][35] The flag has four stripes: Green representing the opposite of red (the most commonly associated romance colour), yellow representing queerplatonic relationships, orange representing lithromantics, and black representing greyromantics as well as alloromantics who reject normative romantic culture.[36]
According to the creator, other flags were circulating as well, and there was not yet an "official" flag. The flag was later changed because it wasn't voted on by the larger community, left out some arospec identities, closely resembled the Rastafarian flag, and included a stripe representing alloromantics.[35]
The second proposed aromantic flag was a five-striped flag, created by Cameron Whimsy in 2014. The stripes were as follows: dark green and light green representing the spectrum of aromantic identities, yellow representing platonicity, and grey and black representing the spectrum of sexual identities in the aromantic community. The yellow stripe was later changed to white due to it causing sensory problems for certain individuals, and is considered to be the most popular aromantic flag. The meaning of the stripes was kept the same during the redesign.[37][38]
A shortened aromantic flag was created by RavenFire803 on the 30th of June, 2021.[39]
Another aromantic flag was coined by Cryptocrew at Hayden000s request and published on the 17th of February, 2021. The yellow flower represents platonic love or alterous/queerplatonic and desires, dark green represents lack of romantic attraction, light green represents the greyromantic spectrum, the black represents a disconnect or disinterest in romantic acts, the upside-down white hearts represent community and how aromantic individuals can love, just not how others may expect them to.[40]
There are several other symbols used to represent aromantics and aromantic love:
- An arrow, due to aromantic often being shortened to aro, which is pronounced the same way.
- Spades, because it's the opposite of hearts.[41]
- A white ring on the middle finger of their left hand (the opposite hand of the black asexual ring).[42]
- A green heart, representing non-romantic love.
- A yellow rose, which represents platonic love.[43]
- An aardvark, an older, lesser-used symbol that seems to have originated from a meme.[44]
- Pineapples, which have the same colour scheme as the alloaro flag.[45]
Several alternate aroflux flags were uploaded by Pride-Flags and created by anonymous or unknown users, one on the 28th of August, 2015, another on the 25th of June, 2016, another on the 10th of March, 2021, another on the 9th of July, 2016, and another on the 14th of June, 2021.[46][47][48][49][50] An alternate aroflux flag was created by Starri-Niqht on the 13th of February, 2021.[51] An alternate aroflux flag was created by NinjaFerretArt on the 14th of June, 2021.[52] An alternate aroflux flag was created by plurgai on the 14th of June, 2021.[53] An alternate aroflux flag was created by Dragonsandmeerkats on the 14th of June, 2021.[54]
The aromantic spectrum flag was created by theflagarchive in 2020.[55]
Aromantic Original (aromantic.org / National Coalition for Aromantic Visibility)
Aromantic (Cameron Whimsy)
Aromantic Shortened (RavenFire803)
Aromantic Alternate (Cryptocrew)
Aromantic Symbol
Aroflux (Pride-Flags)
Aroflux (Pride-Flags)
Aroflux (Pride-Flags)
Aroflux (Pride-Flags)
Aroflux (Pride-Flags)
Aroflux (Starri-Niqht)
Aroflux (NinjaFerretArt)
Aroflux (plurgai)
Aroflux (Dragonsandmeerkats)
Aromantic Spectrum (theflagarchive)
Resources
- ↑ "a-". Wiktionary, https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/a-#Catalan. Accessed on 21 Jan, 2023.
- ↑ 2.0 2.1 Howard, Madeline. "What It Means To Be Aromantic, According To Relationship Experts & Aromantics". Women's Health, 26 Apr, 2022, https://www.womenshealthmag.com/relationships/a26116061/aromantic-definition-sexuality-meaning/.
- ↑ Vesta. "Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week 2022 - Learn more with Vesta". Seattle Pride, 20 Feb, 2022, https://seattlepride.org/news/aromantic-spectrum-awareness-week-2022-learn-more-with-vesta.
- ↑ Levens, Ali. "The SAM: Splitting the Difference Between Romantic and Sexual Orientations". Pepperdine Graphic, 3 May, 2020, https://pepperdine-graphic.com/the-sam-splitting-the-difference-between-romantic-and-sexual-orientations/.
- ↑ "FAQ". Aromanticism, https://www.aromanticism.org/en/faq#can-aromantics-love. Accessed on 22 Jan, 2023.
- ↑ K.A.. "I Am Not Voldemort: An Essay on Love and Amatonormativity". Aro Worlds, 16 Jul, 2019, https://web.archive.org/web/20220318214216/https://aroworlds.com/2019/07/16/i-am-not-voldemort-an-essay-on-love-and-amatonormativity/.
- ↑ BetterHelp Editorial Team. "How To Recognize And Understand Romantic Attraction". Betterhelp, 10 Jan, 2023, https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/relations/what-is-romantic-attraction-how-to-recognize-and-better-understand-it/.
- ↑ Orbit. "Relationship Definitions". The AVEN, 29 Jun, 2005, https://web.archive.org/web/20220429102759/https://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/9433-relationship-definitions/.
- ↑ 9.0 9.1 b-e-b-b-l-e. "Aroflirt". Tumblr, 9 Mar, 2022, https://b-e-b-b-l-e.tumblr.com/post/694408817819189248/aroflirt.
- ↑ neopronouns. "recreated the flag for the term aroflex". Tumblr, 21 Jan, 2021, https://web.archive.org/web/20220127053000/https://neopronouns.tumblr.com/post/640963421249175552/recreated-the-flag-for-the-term-aroflex-which-was. Archived on 27 Jan, 2022.
- ↑ on-fic-writing-spree. "New Mogai Aromantic Spectrum term". Tumblr, 22 Jan, 2021, https://web.archive.org/web/20230813202314/https://www.tumblr.com/on-fic-writing-spree/640952299266752512/new-mogai-aromantic-spectrum-term-because-i-could. Archived on 13 Aug, 2023.
- ↑ 12.0 12.1 queeraro. "Aroflexible, being normally aromantic with the exception of one or two cases of romantic attraction.". Tumblr, 2016, https://web.archive.org/web/20220127040904/https://queeraro.tumblr.com/post/146217363874/aroflexible-being-normally-aromantic-with-the. Archived on 27 Jan, 2022.
- ↑ goldsgenderstuff. "Here’s an idea/proposition for an aroflexible flag!". Tumblr, 2018, https://web.archive.org/web/20220127115226/https://goldsgenderstuff.tumblr.com/post/160786744409/heres-an-ideaproposition-for-an-aroflexible. Archived on 27 Jan, 2022.
- ↑ Star Bit. "Gray-sexual and Gray-asexual need to be two different terms?". The AVEN, 21 Mar, 2016, https://web.archive.org/web/20220127035856/https://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/135841-gray-sexual-and-gray-asexual-need-to-be-two-different-terms/. Archived on 27 Jan, 2022.
- ↑ alienistlesbian. "What is the difference between aroflexible and demisexual". Tumblr, 14 Feb, 2016, https://web.archive.org/web/20220127035542/https://alienistlesbian.tumblr.com/post/139303782740/what-is-the-difference-between-aroflexible-and. Archived on 27 Jan, 2022.
- ↑ Pride-Flags. "Arofluid". DeviantArt, 22 Sep, 2016, https://web.archive.org/web/20220913225812/https://www.deviantart.com/pride-flags/art/Arofluid-633720259. Archived on 13 Sep, 2022.
- ↑ chronically-aspec. "Alternate arofluid pride flag". Tumblr, 19 Aug, 2021, https://web.archive.org/web/20220127035005/https://chronically-aspec.tumblr.com/post/659962762045407232/alternate-arofluid-pride-flag. Archived on 27 Jan, 2022.
- ↑ satusepiida. "Is Arofluid a Thing? It needs to be a thing. It’s a thing now.". Tumblr, 7 Sep, 2015, https://web.archive.org/web/20220127035331/https://satusepiida.tumblr.com/post/128612659927/is-arofluid-a-thing-it-needs-to-be-a-thing-its. Archived on 27 Jan, 2022.
- ↑ 19.0 19.1 Pride-Flags. "Aroflux (1)". DeviantArt, 4 Jul, 2015, https://www.deviantart.com/pride-flags/art/Aroflux-1-543925328.
- ↑ Chaoticcylinder. "Aroflux". LGBTQIA+ Wiki, 2 Jul, 2018, https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Aroflux.
- ↑ the-circus. "Happy Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week". Tumblr, 17 Feb, 2020, https://toothcity.tumblr.com/post/190879933220/the-circus-happy-aromantic-spectrum-awareness.
- ↑ aromanticaardvark. "aroflux: similar to genderflux". Tumblr, 25 Jul, 2014, https://web.archive.org/web/20230626160550/https://www.tumblr.com/aromanticaardvark/92742126325/mogai-archive-aceflux-similar-to-genderflux-in. Archived on 26 Jun, 2023.
- ↑ hypnosiacon-archived. "Arofluix Flag". Tumblr, 1 Mar, 2023, https://hypnosiacon-archived.tumblr.com/post/710593900308480000/arofluix-flag-requested-by-contracorvid.
- ↑ arco-pluris. "Acefluix Pride Flag". Tumblr, 12 Apr, 2019, https://arco-pluris.tumblr.com/post/184126522422/acefluix-pride-flag.
- ↑ 25.0 25.1 Crayonpuppy.x. "Arofog". LGBTQIA+ Wiki, 12 Aug, 2021, https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Arofog.
- ↑ 26.0 26.1 luigis-mogai-mansion. "Aro-jump". Tumblr, 20 May, 2020, https://web.archive.org/web/20220120220220/https://luigis-mogai-mansion.tumblr.com/post/618617450841489408/new-aroacearoace-terms.
- ↑ 27.0 27.1 pokemania. "🔗 Arolinken/Arolink ::". Tumblr, 20 Sep, 2021, https://web.archive.org/web/20230621213109/https://www.tumblr.com/pokemania/662817947357773824/flag-without-symbol-without-spikes-and-symbol. Archived on 21 Jun, 2023.
- ↑ 28.0 28.1 star-allos. "Hello aspecs who aren’t strictly aro and/or ace!". Tumblr, 21 Nov, 2019, https://web.archive.org/web/20220226144711/https://star-allos.tumblr.com/post/189204961946/yeah-i-think-labels-cause-more-problems-than.
- ↑ 29.0 29.1 pride-color-schemes. "Arospike". Tumblr, 26 Jun, 2016, https://pride-color-schemes.tumblr.com/post/146492080643/arospike.
- ↑ Trans Wellness Ontario. "Arospike". Facebook, 26 Feb, 2022, https://www.facebook.com/TransWellnessOntario/photos/a.1174688576398423/1189994488201165/?type=3.
- ↑ 31.0 31.1 pride-color-schemes. "Acevague and Arovague". Tumblr, 22 Jan, 2017, https://web.archive.org/web/20220120154545/https://pride-color-schemes.tumblr.com/post/156211900305/acevague-and-arovague.
- ↑ 32.0 32.1 Pride-Flags. "Arovoid". DeviantArt, 23 Apr, 2021, https://web.archive.org/web/20220626102632/https://www.deviantart.com/pride-flags/art/Arovoid-872880042.
- ↑ "Aromantic flag and symbols explained". Asexuals.net, https://www.asexuals.net/aromantic-flag-and-symbols-explained/. Accessed on 12 Dec, 2023.
- ↑ Aromantic Aardvark. "The National Coalition for Aromantic Visibility". Tumblr, 16 Oct, 2011, https://aromanticaardvark.tumblr.com/post/11529762586/national-coalition-for-aromantic-visibility.
- ↑ 35.0 35.1 aromanticnerd. "basilcraft-deactivated20210223 said,". Tumblr, https://web.archive.org/web/20230305020311/https://aromanticnerd.tumblr.com/post/78499115232/hi-could-you-please-tell-me-what-the-flag-in-your. Archived on 5 Mar, 2023.
- ↑ lithromantic. "The icon you're using, is that the official pride colors for lithros? :)". Tumblr, 9 Nov, 2013, https://web.archive.org/web/20230625002808/https://www.tumblr.com/lithromantic/66435960207/the-icon-youre-using-is-that-the-official-pride. Archived on 25 Jun, 2023.
- ↑ Whimsy, Cameron. "over the past few months...". Tumblr, 21 Aug, 2014, https://cameronwhimsy.tumblr.com/post/95352732283/over-the-past-few-months-ive-been-reviewing-my.
- ↑ Whimsy, Cameron. "whoops yeah i just realised...". Tumblr, 16 Nov, 2014, https://cameronwhimsy.tumblr.com/post/102698477928/whoops-yeah-i-just-realised-i-never-actually-made.
- ↑ rxven.in.the.clouds. "Aromantic". LGBTQIA+ Wiki, 1 Jul, 2021, https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Aromantic.
- ↑ Cryptocrew. "Aromantic". LGBTQIA+ Wiki, 17 Feb, 2021, https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Aromantic.
- ↑ aromanticaardvark. "what's an aromantic spade?". Tumblr, 7 Aug, 2014, https://www.tumblr.com/aromanticaardvark/93996888177/whats-an-aromantic-spade.
- ↑ DuddyRene. "AROMANTIC RING?!". The AVEN, 30 Mar, 2015, https://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/116225-aromantic-ring/.
- ↑ "orphilan asked:". Tumblr, https://www.tumblr.com/heartless-aro/search/Aromantic%20symbols%20. Accessed on 5 Apr, 2023.
- ↑ Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week. "Anonymous asked:". Tumblr, https://arospecawarenessweek.tumblr.com/post/116147143412/hello-quick-question-why-are-aardvarks-an. Accessed on 22 Jan, 2023.
- ↑ legally-x. "Aromantic Symbols". Tumblr, https://www.tumblr.com/legally-x/635105454596472832/i-think-aromantic-symbols-are-cool-and-deserve-to. Accessed on 5 Apr, 2023.
- ↑ Pride-Flags. "Aroflux (2)". DeviantArt, 28 Aug, 2015, https://www.deviantart.com/pride-flags/art/Aroflux-2-556657299.
- ↑ Pride-Flags. "Aroflux (3)". DeviantArt, 25 Jun, 2016, https://www.deviantart.com/pride-flags/art/Aroflux-3-617510982.
- ↑ Pride-Flags. "Aroflux (4)". DeviantArt, 10 Mar, 2021, https://www.deviantart.com/pride-flags/art/Aroflux-4-872765603.
- ↑ Pride-Flags. "Aroflux (5)". DeviantArt, 9 Jul, 2016, https://www.deviantart.com/pride-flags/art/Aroflux-5-620630828.
- ↑ Pride-Flags. "Aroflux (7)". DeviantArt, 14 Jun, 2021, https://www.deviantart.com/pride-flags/art/Aroflux-7-882481835.
- ↑ Starri-Niqht. "Aroflux (3)". DeviantArt, 3 Feb, 2021, https://www.deviantart.com/pride-flags/art/Aroflux-3-870192558.
- ↑ NinjaFerretArt. "Aroflux (4)". DeviantArt, 14 Jun, 2021, https://www.deviantart.com/pride-flags/art/Aroflux-4-882481832.
- ↑ plurgai. "Aroflux (5)". DeviantArt, 14 Jun, 2021, https://www.deviantart.com/pride-flags/art/Aroflux-5-882481845.
- ↑ Dragonsandmeerkats. "Aroflux (6)". DeviantArt, 14 Jun, 2021, https://www.deviantart.com/pride-flags/art/Aroflux-6-882481841.
- ↑ theflagarchive. "Aromantic spectrum flag!". Tumblr, 2020, https://web.archive.org/web/20231212212523/https://theflagarchive.tumblr.com/post/625679778293350400/aromantic-spectrum-flag-as-requested-and-as-ive. Archived on 12 Dec, 2023.
